When it comes to jokes, dads have a unique ability to make anything, and everything, into a funny story. If there was a contest for who could make the worst and cheesiest jokes, dads would absolutely dominate. It’s because of them that we can still laugh at puns and know that some jokes are clearly better left unsaid.
So what makes a good dad joke? The best jokes come at a moment in time where you’re already pumped up and ready to go, and then suddenly, when you least expect it – there it is. So here is a compilation of some of the best and worst dad jokes.
1. Which bear is the most condescending?
A pan-duh!
2. What kind of noise does a witch’s vehicle make?
Brrrroooom, brrroooom
3. What kind of drink can be bitter and sweet?
Reali-tea
4. What would the Terminator be called in his retirement?
The Exterminator
5. Why was the colour green notoriously single?
It was always so jaded
6. My boss told me to have a good day
So I went home.
7. I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.
8. How do celebrities stay cool?
They have many fans.
9. Dogs can’t operate MRI machines.
But catscan.
10. Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth.
Then it becomes a soap opera.
11. What kind of music do chiropractors like?
Hip pop.
12. Stop looking for the perfect match.
Use a lighter.
13. What kind of car does a sheep like to drive?
A lamborghini
14. What did the juicer say to the orange during self-quarantine?
Can’t wait to squeeze you!
15. What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?
A tuba toothpaste.
16. What concert costs just 45 cents?
A 50 Cent concert featuring Nickelback!
17. What are the strongest days of the week? Saturday and Sunday.
The rest are weak-days.
18. What did the fried rice say to the shrimp?
“Don’t wok away from me.”
19. What’s an astronaut’s favorite part about the computer?
The space bar on the keyboard.
20. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself?
It was two tired.
